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*Is unable to resist posting this brilliant text*

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I AM THE WALRUS
By John Lennon and Paul McCartney

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I AM HE AS YOU ARE HE AS YOU ARE ME AND WE ARE ALL TOGETHER.
SEE HOW THEY RUN, LIKE PIGS FROM A GUN, SEE HOW THEY FLY.
I'M CRYING.

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SITTING ON A CORNFLAKE WAITING FOR THE VAN TO COME,
CORPORATION T-SHIRT, STUPID BLOOD TUESDAY MAN,
YOU BEEN A NAUGHTY BOY, YOU LET YOUR FACE GROW LONG.

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I AM THE EGGMAN, (oooh)
THEY ARE THE EGGMEN, (oooh)
I AM THE WALRUS, GOO GOO G'JOOB.

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MISTER CITY P´LICEMAN, SITTING PRETTY LITTLE P´LICEMEN IN A ROW.
SEE HOW THEY FLY LIKE LUCY IN THE SKY , SEE HOW THEY RUN.
I'M CRYING.

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I'M CRYING, (oooh)
I'M CRYING,
I'M CRYING.

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YELLOW MATTER CUSTARD DRIPPING FROM A DEAD DOG'S EYE.
CRABALOCKER FISHWIFE, PORNOGRAPHIC PRIESTESS,
BOY, YOU BEEN A NAUGHTY GIRL, YOU LET YOUR KNICKERS DOWN.

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I AM THE EGGMAN, (oooh)
THEY ARE THE EGGMEN, (oooh)
I AM THE WALRUS, GOO GOO G'JOOB.
SITTING IN AN ENGLISH GARDEN WAITING FOR THE SUN,
IF THE SUN DON'T COME YOU GET A TAN FROM STANDING IN THE ENGLISH RAIN .

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I AM THE EGGMAN, ("Now, good Sir...")
THEY ARE THE EGGMEN, ("the man tame by fortunes...)
I AM THE WALRUS, GOO GOO G'JOOB, GOO GOO G'JOOB.

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EXPERT, TEXPERT, CHOKING SMOKERS,
DON'T YOU THINK THE JOKER LAUGHS AT YOU. (hoo-hoo-hoo, hee-hee-hee, ha-ha-ha)
SEE HOW THEY SMILE, LIKE PIGS IN A STY, SEE HOW THEY SNIED.
I'M CRYING.

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SEMOLINA PILCHARD CLIMBING UP THE EIFFEL TOWER,
ELEMENT´RY PENGUIN SINGING HARE KRISHNA .
MAN, YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THEM KICKING EDGAR ALLEN POE.

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I AM THE EGGMAN, (oooh)
THEY ARE THE EGGMEN, (oooh)
I AM THE WALRUS, GOO GOO G'JOOB, GOO GOO G'JOOB,
GOO GOO G'JOOB, GOO GOO G´JOOB, GOO, (oooh)
JOOB-JOOB-JOOB, JOOB, JOOB, JOOB, JOOB-JOOB,
JOOB-JOOB, JOOB-JOOB.

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OOMPAH, OOMPAH, STICK IT UP YOUR JUMPER!
OOMPAH, OOMPAH, STICK IT UP YOUR JUMPER!
OOMPAH, OOMPAH, STICK IT.....

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EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE, EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE,
EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE, EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE,
EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE, EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE,
EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE, EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE,
EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE, EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE,
EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE, EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE,
EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE, EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE,
EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE, EV´RYBODY´S GOT ONE.......

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"Villain, take my purse;
if ever thou wilt thrive, bury my body;
and give the letter which thou find´st about to Edmund , Earl of Gloster;
Seek him out upon the British party;
0' untimely death!"

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"I know thee well;
A serviceable villain;
as duteous to the vices of my mistress
as badness would desire."

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"What, is he dead?"
"Sit you down, Father; rest you."