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My brother's name is Christian and my mum was always afraid it would get shortened to Chris but its only happened once and Christian didn't answer, he refused to!
I also have students named Alexander, Joshua and Thomas who only get called by that, never a nickname.
Also one of my friends Samuel never ever goes by Sam.

I think it is very presumptuous of parents - even parents who hate nicknames and don't refer to their child by them - to condemn everyone else for using them. My friends Alexandra and Benjamin are called Alexandra and Benjamin pretty consistently, but if Alex or Ben is used in a hurry or in affection by someone else, they don't freak out. I really dislike Alex, but will occasionally use it to refer to her anyway, because I like her a lot and it is fun to play with her name. As long as it's clear he goes by Nathan I think your friend is being a bit of a baby.

I have a fear that people are going to call my son Matt. My mom suggested Matty for a nickname for her to call him and I put an absolute stop to it. We didn't avoid the name because we really like Matteo with the nickname Teo. So far no problems... I've noticed that if I call him Teo... so does everybody else. Matt I guess I could tolerate... but not Matty.

This message was edited 5/6/2008, 3:37 PM

Well, she did name him Nathan and not Nate, with the clear intention of only calling him by his full name so I sort of get where she's coming from... but how are other people to know that until she tells them? I mean, come on, she had to have expected it.

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And really, I don't think it's right to go flying off the handle that way. What other people call him is personal between them and the child, not her. My brothern Cristian's nn is "Church" and at first that really pissed my mom off but she got over it. There's no way to stop it unless she tracks down every last person that knows him and tells him, "Hey, I'm his mommy and I don't like it when you call him that." He's 19 in a few months. Little Nathan is going to grow up and he'll want to choose what to be called. What if he likes the nn Nate? She can still call him Nathan to her heart's content, but Nathan, in the end, is going to be the only one allowing people to call him what they do.

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And no, to answer your question in a few words, Nate is not really that bad.

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I had a friend named Nate. It's nice, and it suited him better than Nathan.

I don't understand why people shorten it to Nate if that's not what he's introduced as. That's like saying "Here's my son Ben" and people calling him "Benjamin", presuming that's his name.

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If they say "this is Nathan" - then I think people should call him Nathan, because that's his name. I don't understand people wanting to shorten the name unless they are asked to!

I can see where she's coming from, although, like you say, if I was worried about that I just wouldn't use the name. For example, I love the names Christopher and Daniel, but hate Chris and Dan, so I would only ever use them as mns. I guess though if you're not a name nerd these things might not occur to you at first

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S xx

My aunt

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I have posted this thought before, but it was a long time ago. My aunt named her sons Thomas and Nicholas. She was very clear from the beginning that they were not to be called anything but Thomas and Nicholas, and would always be quick to correct those that called them anything else. This worked for a while, but when they got into junior high and high school, it was unavoidable. They are known to their friends at school as Tom and Nick... but to the family, they are known as Thomas and Nicholas.

My boyfriend's dad hated nicknames

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And therefore none of his seven kdis used one. I think it's if she corrects people when they call him Nate but she shouldn't freak out on them. Of course, it is left to the son when he's old enough. My boyfriend broke the no nickname rule and uses Xander.

No I wouldn't avoid using a name if I hated the NN it can give. I'd call my child my other NN or their full FN. Maybe her son will end up not liking Nate as well when he's older.

I can understand her point of view, as I really like the name Lily, but dislike the nn Lil, but although I dislike the nn I would expect for some people to call her it, so I'd prob just avoid the name.

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:-)

I think Nate's not that bad of a nickname, but if she doesn't like it and her son starts to not like it than people probably shouldn't call him that. She shouldn't get that upset though, especially if people don't know she hates.

I like Nathan also, but hate Nate:-)

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I have the same problem with Gabriel and Rafael, love the anmes but hate all the nns. I guess I'm lucky to live in a country where full names are used more than nns:-)

Well, I guess she just doesn't like it and it's legitimate for her not want people to call him that, though she shouldn't get too mad about it. I like some nicknames of my name but not others. I guess, however, when the kid's old enough to chose, it will be up to him to decide what he likes being called.

Is it possible that she didn't realize just how much she hated Nate until after he was named Nathan and people started calling him Nate? I don't think Nate is so terrible, but it is a matter of taste. I also find it presumptuous for people to call him Nate without being asked to or at the very least hearing his parents call him so first.
I've known Michaels and Daniels whose name was never shortened, a nickname isn't inevitable.

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I'm in a similar situation, actually. My step mother insists on calling my daughter, Cecily, "CeeCee". I never realized just how much I detest that nickname until she started using it. It makes my skin crawl everytime I hear it.

Feel like your friend does.

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I like the name Nathan and wouldn't back off only if I hated a certain nn, I think. Nate is terrible.

Personally, I think Nate is kind of cute. I can't understand why Nate bothers her that much that it actually makes her tell people off because of it. As -A- pointed out this might be something she could have thought of before naming her son Nathan. As he gets older and starts school I think alot of his friends will start calling him Nate, and there is nothing she can do about it. She should be more relaxed about it IMO.

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And for your Ps, my name isn't short at all but I have NO nn and I've never had. I would like to have a nick name so again I can't really see what's wrong with a nn. It's not like Nate is something horrible.

I agree actually, I like Nathan but hate 'Nate'

If she hates Nate so fervently there are plenty of other names she could have used to avoid such an inevitability. She sounds like an onomastic masochist to me.

This message was edited 5/6/2008, 8:03 AM