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HelpRe: No nickname preferred
in reply to a message by RoxStar
I agree
There is truth that I hate being called "Barb" because I despise this particular short-form; however, I won't correct folks any longer. If someone calls me "Barb" - or more importantly, refers to me as Barb, I won't correct them, as I do not want to seem that self-conscious. If I "know what someone means" or "that the person refers, or is referring, to me, then I understand.
Same is true with grammar. If I understand the thought, I won't correct a Grammatical Error. That to me would seem snobbish, as though I were trying to show that I know something that another person does not, which is not so. I have difficulty seeing so I may commit more errors than I know. Also - I am trying to wean away from formal writing on this board. I hope folks will be patient with me - and forgive me from my own pretensions.
There is truth that I hate being called "Barb" because I despise this particular short-form; however, I won't correct folks any longer. If someone calls me "Barb" - or more importantly, refers to me as Barb, I won't correct them, as I do not want to seem that self-conscious. If I "know what someone means" or "that the person refers, or is referring, to me, then I understand.
Same is true with grammar. If I understand the thought, I won't correct a Grammatical Error. That to me would seem snobbish, as though I were trying to show that I know something that another person does not, which is not so. I have difficulty seeing so I may commit more errors than I know. Also - I am trying to wean away from formal writing on this board. I hope folks will be patient with me - and forgive me from my own pretensions.
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Replies
Do you feel uncomfortable about all possible nicknames, or just Barb? Which is a bit thorny and spikey! I've known Barbara people known as Bar, Babs, Barbie (while very young) and Bibi.
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Although I pass through phases on Barbie, yet simultaneously, I only want certain people to use this "childish" form; yet I am happy to use (Barbie) on specific occasions - including business. I'll even use / utilize this form sometimes when I feel punchy (if I should happen to meet new people). Still I consider this an affectionate form too.
Strangely, I am allowing my "weird side" to not only "step forward" but to "lead", more of late.
I am trying to like & use Babs--as though to introduce myself with this form, but I just can't; fearing the name will stick. Only one person has called me "Babs", which did not fare too well.
Strangely, I love Barbs - which to me is affectionate. Only one person called me this beyond "extremely close family members or specific friends" - and my hart nearly fell from my chest. She - a semi-goth-girl bartender, who never knew of my association, - where all other female bartenders knew me as Barbie. I can only image that she used "Barbs" to differentiate herself among her other colleagues.
Strangely, I am allowing my "weird side" to not only "step forward" but to "lead", more of late.
I am trying to like & use Babs--as though to introduce myself with this form, but I just can't; fearing the name will stick. Only one person has called me "Babs", which did not fare too well.
Strangely, I love Barbs - which to me is affectionate. Only one person called me this beyond "extremely close family members or specific friends" - and my hart nearly fell from my chest. She - a semi-goth-girl bartender, who never knew of my association, - where all other female bartenders knew me as Barbie. I can only image that she used "Barbs" to differentiate herself among her other colleagues.
This message was edited 8/22/2018, 5:51 PM
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I mentioned that not all men are comfortable with the feminine connotation associated with my name.
If it is unusual (to meet with) a male Barbra (Barbara), would it be more unusual still to meet with a male Barbie - at a business meeting; and would it be stranger still--and further, depreciatively atrocious, to question, or even reveal the subtlest notion of discomfort - even intrigue--within a group of adults in a professional or even governmental setting?
Would there be a white elephant in the room? (Why do I think of Ernest Hemingway?)
This is what I meant when I stated the following last month -
I mentioned this July 12 2018 comment on Perrine's July 10 "Jamie for both genders" query
"I've read articles (perhaps on BTN - I can't remember the source) about folks with names that end with the "ie" sound, whether spelled with a "y" or "ie" or however else, which mention that "studies" (I always doubt the accuracy of such results) indicate that folks with names which sound more formal fare better than those with "the more child-like" "ie" sound. That is partial reason that I like to use the "Barbie" name in professional settings. It creates a harmless anomaly so overt that it is almost ridiculous--but, far from ridicule, it is harmless & benign - therefore advantageous."
Not during a business meeting, but I met with a lady who approached me last fall--who I also happened to learn that her name is Barbara. She seemed of Asian descent - and I became pleased that we shared similar heritage; she seemed pleased too. She mentioned that she never uses Barbie.
If it is unusual (to meet with) a male Barbra (Barbara), would it be more unusual still to meet with a male Barbie - at a business meeting; and would it be stranger still--and further, depreciatively atrocious, to question, or even reveal the subtlest notion of discomfort - even intrigue--within a group of adults in a professional or even governmental setting?
Would there be a white elephant in the room? (Why do I think of Ernest Hemingway?)
This is what I meant when I stated the following last month -
I mentioned this July 12 2018 comment on Perrine's July 10 "Jamie for both genders" query
"I've read articles (perhaps on BTN - I can't remember the source) about folks with names that end with the "ie" sound, whether spelled with a "y" or "ie" or however else, which mention that "studies" (I always doubt the accuracy of such results) indicate that folks with names which sound more formal fare better than those with "the more child-like" "ie" sound. That is partial reason that I like to use the "Barbie" name in professional settings. It creates a harmless anomaly so overt that it is almost ridiculous--but, far from ridicule, it is harmless & benign - therefore advantageous."
Not during a business meeting, but I met with a lady who approached me last fall--who I also happened to learn that her name is Barbara. She seemed of Asian descent - and I became pleased that we shared similar heritage; she seemed pleased too. She mentioned that she never uses Barbie.
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