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This is my son, Arnold.
You Say: Hi Arnold! Do you have a nickname?
You Think: I doubt there's any nickname that could make Arnold sound like he belongs in this century.

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This is my daughter, Bree.
You Say: What a sweet little girl.
You Think: Meh, what's wrong with Aubrey or Brianna?

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This is my daughter, Flynn.
You Say: Hi Flynn.
You Think: Too masculine for a little girl.

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This is my son, Eugene.
You Say: He looks just like you!
You Think: No, thanks.

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This is my daughter, Nellie.
You Say: Hi Nellie.
You Think: Cute, but not really a name that "grows" with a child.

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This is my son, Lemuel.
You Say: I'm sorry, what did you say his name was?
You Think: Like a lemming?

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This is my daughter, Myrtle.
You Say: She's adorable. How old is she?
You Think: ...because that is not a name that belongs on anyone under the age of 80.

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This is my daughter, Bernice.
You Say: Hi Bernice!
You Think: It's okay, but I've always liked Bernadette better.

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This is my daughter, Amaryllis.
You Say: Hi Amaryllis.
You Think: Pretty, but maybe a little complex.

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This is my son Dudley.
You Say: Hi Dudley. Do you call him by a nickname?
You Think: ...because if you don't, some schoolyard bully is going to christen him "Dud" and it's probably going to stick with him for a long time.

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(Hope I wasn't too harsh, it's all in good fun)