View Message

The interesting this is, names only have a certain gender because we as a society say they do. Same with names being unisex. I think just name your kid whatever name you want, whether it traditionally fits their gender or not. Whatever sounds nice to you. If your kid is an adult and doesn't like their name, they can always legally change it if they want.

I think it’s fine to use gendered names as opposed to unisex names. If a child grows up to want to change their gender they can always change their name or use a nickname. I knew a trans man who went by his initials because his birth name was very feminine. A person can change their name for any reason.
Some unisex names I like:

Jaden
Hadley
Sage
Sky
Morgan
Rory

I'm all for queer rights, but I do not think that children are really being "gendered" by names. Their names are meant to match their sex, which we can only find out does not match their gender when they get older. Also, the gender of names is determined by society. If people en masse would name their sons Britney, it would become unisex. The problem is that it is unlikely that enough parents would use the name Britney on a boy to create a long-lasting trend. Names like Courtney and Whitney on girls became unisex or "feminine" through people naming their daughters that. But it is no longer considered masculine enough to use on boys. If I had my way, the gender of a name would not override the identity and personality of the individual.

---

Unisex names I like:
Darcy
Jade
Hayden
Raven
Ocean
Lake
Riley
Laken
Harper
Harley
Preston
Jewel
Garnet
Skyler
Sky
Marley
July
Casey
Cassidy
Kennedy
Kendall
Alex
Alexis
Meredith
Ash
Blue
Gray
Ellison
Scout
Emery
Reese
Allison
Jordan
Morgan
Cameron

---

Names I wish were unisex:

... Load Full Message

This message was edited 4/5/2024, 2:44 PM

When it comes to names given at birth, I don't think it matter if it's unisex or not, because it can always be changed. With or without a unisex name, pretty much all children will be raised with their gender assigned at birth, so a name would only be a part of how their gender and sex are treated as intertwined on a regular basis. There's nothing wrong with gender or having a gendered name, they can always be changed. I don't think the process of naming a child should have to rely on the unlikely (but obviously still present) possibility of their gender identity not fitting their biological sex. I don't think that all unisex names stem from surnames, there's Sage, Dana, Aviv, Kit, Reyes, Angel, Aster, Bryn, Cedar, Onyx, Jade, Cyan, Dee, Haven, Jody, Noah, Guadalupe, ect. and names from cultures and languages like Hawaiian, in which all names are unisex (Leilani, Lehua, Keanu).
Some of my favourite gender neutral names would probably be Sage, Jade, Cedar, Angel, River, Alexis, Rio and Shirley.

I think it's ok to use gendered names, because I don't think gender is the bad guy. I just wish there was more curiosity and flexibility about it.

---

I know of people who gave their children unisex names, but the kids still grew up to pick new names for themselves if they changed gender. I guess you could say that a unisex name is more of a blank slate, but it doesn't erase the need for a person to explore their own identity, which is often difficult and complex. I see what you are saying, and highly gendered names could definitely be an issue for some, but I am not convinced that purposefully picking a genderless name for everyone would be like a magic wand solving everything, you know? If a child's parents are the sort that will be supportive and kind, they will probably be supportive no matter what they name their child. "Gender" itself isn't the enemy so there's really nothing wrong with choosing a gendered name at first, if you like the name.

---

That's the thing I can't seem to get my head around with gender stuff - if we agree that it's not bad to be female, or male, or gender fluid, or anything, then why is it bad to play with and acknowledge gendered stuff?? If it would be ok for Roy to say they are a Rosalie, then Rosalie was always ok even if they are clearly gendered. Does that make sense? It's still kind of fuzzy for me but I think that's the way I feel about it.

---

I like a lot of surname names, and nature names. I think Onyx is a cool unisex idea, for example. Wren should be unisex, I don't know why it isn't. Aspen, River, Jasper, Robin, all so cute.

From my experience unisex names are already becoming far more common, and with rapidly changing gender norms as well as more acceptance of trans people (and especially trans children) I can only see them being used more and more. I generally see it being a good thing.

---

My favorite unisex names are Pepper and Riley. I also really like Jasper as a gender neutral name but a lot of people seem to hate it haha

Not all unisex names are last names. Some are just normal first names and some are word names. Those are the ones I tend to prefer.

---

I think it's more common for people to use "gendered" names but decouple them from their gendered associations. I think this is becoming more commonly accepted as more and more nonbinary people are comfortable using names that people think of as gendered. (Like, nowadays when someone comes out as nonbinary, they don't necessarily feel pressured to change their name to a unisex name. So other people get more and more used to the idea that a "gendered name" doesn't always indicate the gender of the bearer. That makes all names more flexible for everyone even if the names are still associated with certain genders.)
Basically I just think that the trend is toward more names becoming unisex (or at least accepted for multiple genders) rather than people choosing more names that are ALREADY considered unisex.

---

I like these as unisex: Morgan, Rowan, River, Briar, Cypress, Indigo, Lan, Andrea, Francis, Shiloh, Sam, Aeron, Bryn, Eirian, Imani, Loren, Nikora, Nikita, Raven, Lark, Wren, Sparrow, Sage, Vanja, Julian, Cameron, Kaoru, Linden, Matija, Sasha, Sequoia, Luca, Chandra, Robin, Elvan, Carmine, Camille

If the children don't identify with their physiological gender, then they change it. I know an Adrian who spent years as Phoebe.

---

As for unisex names, I think it is only polite to give a gendered name as a middle name. I believe in choice.

Interestingly, unisex names, at least in the US, are more common in conservative areas where gender roles are more enforced. While I have known some people specifically choose a name that unisex because they didn’t want to enforce gender roles, its a minority that do so.

---

My favorite unisex names are Robin and Parker.