Sinon Karol: Sin on, Karol. Just keep right on sinning.
Gable Tuff: The wimpiest, whiniest mama's boy in the school.
Dublin Cael: The new Irish leafy-green-veggie.
Ledger Joshua: AKA Notebook.
Cage Jason: At last! The long-awaited sequel to the Friday the 13th movies! "Cage Jason!"
Bridge Sawyer: The guy who saws the bridge apart.
Seyber Christopher James: Is that meant to be kre8yv speak for cyber?
Tugg Carson: Tugg him and Yankk him and Pullll him.
Strider James: Strider is the name of a dog who appears as the title character in teh sequel to Beverly Cleary's "Dear Mr. Henshaw." It also sounds like a sneaker.
Trustyn James: I do't trustyn anybody who phrases it like an order.
Sky-Angel Allen: Poor guy.
True Lee: I take it back. This guy has it worse.
Raider James: Jesse James's long-lost outlaw brother.
Dymond Alexander: And he will have at least two girl Diamonds in his class.
hero Oil: Hair tonic? Petroleum company? Sketchy vitamin? What the hell were they thinking?
Fate Lil' Micheal: That will look great on his job applications.
Coulter Shepherd: They had a choice between a horse or a dog.
Skyt Blue: Appearing live at the Lusty Kitty! She's hot, she's huge and she's horny!
Fantasia Marie: I just can't take somebody named Fantasia seriously.
Prairie Mae Liliana: Or she Mae not.
Essence Morning Star: These parents have been inhaling something all right, but the smell of fresh morning air isn't likely to be it.
Gyingingowa Julius: Sticka male name next to a totally random-seeming and hard to pronounce jumble of letters.
Bethlehem Sisay: The Bethlehem Sissy.
September Faith: Oh please.
Sweet Grass Dreamz: Obviously some pretty sweet grass is involved here.
Talladega Love: She hangs around racetracks trying to pick up crew chiefs.
Montanna Jo: Joe Montana is going to tackle you.
Rogue Marie: Who wants a rogue for a daughter? Or a son for that matter?
Galexy Moon: More like Disslexie Moon.