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HelpRe: Kalyani
in reply to a message by tara
If you spell it Kalyani, I'll assume it's three syllables, not four--kahl-YAH-nee rather than kah-lee-AH-nee, which seems to be what you're going for.
Kalyani does nothing for me, but it is a perfectly nice name, and I balk at this idea that, say, an all-American girl of German and Irish origin couldn't be as much a Kalyani as a woman born in India. There's just such a latent racism in that idea--that Western names are good enough for the entire world (when's the last time you met an Indian woman named Brenda and gone, "Wow, that's a weird juxtaposition"?), but the rest of the world's names aren't good enough, won't "work", on a child from Western culture. It's more complicated than that, I know, but I could probably go on for pages on this--it's one of my biggest naming pet peeves.
Which is not to say that I think you're racist, btw--it's this widespread belief people have that I have a problem with.
And Adelle once summed it up really nicely, far better than I ever could do: http://www.behindthename.com/bb/arcview.php?id=761048&board=baby
So basically, if you like Kalyani, don't let the part where your children are fair keep you away from it.
Array
Kalyani does nothing for me, but it is a perfectly nice name, and I balk at this idea that, say, an all-American girl of German and Irish origin couldn't be as much a Kalyani as a woman born in India. There's just such a latent racism in that idea--that Western names are good enough for the entire world (when's the last time you met an Indian woman named Brenda and gone, "Wow, that's a weird juxtaposition"?), but the rest of the world's names aren't good enough, won't "work", on a child from Western culture. It's more complicated than that, I know, but I could probably go on for pages on this--it's one of my biggest naming pet peeves.
Which is not to say that I think you're racist, btw--it's this widespread belief people have that I have a problem with.
And Adelle once summed it up really nicely, far better than I ever could do: http://www.behindthename.com/bb/arcview.php?id=761048&board=baby
So basically, if you like Kalyani, don't let the part where your children are fair keep you away from it.
Array
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Whew! Good thing you're not insinuating i'm racist, because that would just be crazy and a far, far cry from the truth!
Regarding ethnic names on my cracker kids, it's more of a respect thing for the culture represented in the name. For example, would a Mexican go, "Huh?" at a blonde haired Juan? i don't know. That was more my question. i really don't see anything racist about it at all, although i am open to learning something new here. i guess racism rears its ugly head in all different forms. The reasoning behind my question was not racist, nor does it feel racist to me. But again, to others it may...
Thanks,
tara
Regarding ethnic names on my cracker kids, it's more of a respect thing for the culture represented in the name. For example, would a Mexican go, "Huh?" at a blonde haired Juan? i don't know. That was more my question. i really don't see anything racist about it at all, although i am open to learning something new here. i guess racism rears its ugly head in all different forms. The reasoning behind my question was not racist, nor does it feel racist to me. But again, to others it may...
Thanks,
tara
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No, no--the last thing I want to imply is that you're some kind of ignorant, racist jerk. :( I'm sure you're a very nice person.
It's a complicated issue, because of the possibility of being condescending and inadvertantly dumb about this kind of thing. You know the type--the ladies who go, "Oh, I named my daughter Jaci, which, in the Native American culture, represents the moon." And what they've really done is changed the spelling of a trendy name so that it's vaguely legitimate, made no effort to show any respect for the culture that it comes from (gee, the "Native American" culture? They're all homogenous, feathers-and-rain-dances in your mind, aren't they?), and they look at that culture with a weird, romanticized condescension. (I was just sitting in class with a girl like this, actually--she talked about how people from non-Western countries have it so much harder than we do (the implication being that without all the luxuries of white America, their lives are pointless), and she thinks that you can tell as much in their music, which just sounds so sorrowful and sad. And then the professor pointed out that what we were listening to was actually from a wedding ceremony. I just wanted to smack that girl, ferreals.)
But if you (you general) happen to love, say Suzume, you pronounce it as accurately as is possible in your accent, and you don't act like you're some kind of amazingly open-minded and special person for using this or that name? I really think it should be okay. Non-French people use Simone, non-Norwegians use Ingrid, non-Italians use Bianca. And if non-Arabs love Noor or non-Yorubans think Dayo is lovely, I see no reason why they should be told, "No, you don't look right."
This is a multi-cultural world. Trying to keep everyone in the "right" pigeonholes is unnecessary and small-minded (again, not trying to say that you are, since the question of "what would a Mexican think of Norwegian Juan?" is a fair question--I just don't think there should be a problem).
Does that make sense? It's an issue that's hard for me to keep my focus on, because there are so many related things I want to drag in with it.
Array
It's a complicated issue, because of the possibility of being condescending and inadvertantly dumb about this kind of thing. You know the type--the ladies who go, "Oh, I named my daughter Jaci, which, in the Native American culture, represents the moon." And what they've really done is changed the spelling of a trendy name so that it's vaguely legitimate, made no effort to show any respect for the culture that it comes from (gee, the "Native American" culture? They're all homogenous, feathers-and-rain-dances in your mind, aren't they?), and they look at that culture with a weird, romanticized condescension. (I was just sitting in class with a girl like this, actually--she talked about how people from non-Western countries have it so much harder than we do (the implication being that without all the luxuries of white America, their lives are pointless), and she thinks that you can tell as much in their music, which just sounds so sorrowful and sad. And then the professor pointed out that what we were listening to was actually from a wedding ceremony. I just wanted to smack that girl, ferreals.)
But if you (you general) happen to love, say Suzume, you pronounce it as accurately as is possible in your accent, and you don't act like you're some kind of amazingly open-minded and special person for using this or that name? I really think it should be okay. Non-French people use Simone, non-Norwegians use Ingrid, non-Italians use Bianca. And if non-Arabs love Noor or non-Yorubans think Dayo is lovely, I see no reason why they should be told, "No, you don't look right."
This is a multi-cultural world. Trying to keep everyone in the "right" pigeonholes is unnecessary and small-minded (again, not trying to say that you are, since the question of "what would a Mexican think of Norwegian Juan?" is a fair question--I just don't think there should be a problem).
Does that make sense? It's an issue that's hard for me to keep my focus on, because there are so many related things I want to drag in with it.
Array
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i see your point. i live in a very secluded bubble of the world and i don't see much racism at all, thankfully. i see that in mainstream America someone might think how hip it is to name their child some ethnic name without respect or knowledge about the culture, etc. i haven't encountered this in my time, but it sounds legitimate for sure.
So, thanks!
tara
So, thanks!
tara
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Very well thought out and expressed, Array!
n/t
n/t
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