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This is my son, Ember.
You Say: "Hello, Ember."
You Think: Oh dear.

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This is my son, Paige.
You Say: "Hi, Paige."
You Think: Please, no!

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This is my son, Prince.
You Say: "Nice name."
You Think: Stupid name.

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This is my son, Apple.
You Say: "Nice to meet you."
You Think: That's a fruit!!

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This is my son, Cross.
You Say: "That's a cool name."
You Think: Mmm-hmm.

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This is my son, Labyrinth.
You Say: "Say it again?"
You Think: I KNOW she did not just say that!