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Stand at the top (or bottom) of a flight of stairs, then yell at the top of your lungs every possible combination you can think of. The one that sounds most pleasant yet most, um "Oh, boy. I'm in DEEP trouble," should be the one you choose (especially since you already know that that will be the way the child [and the neighbors] will hear it most frequently.)

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Phyllis (aka Sidhe Uaine or Gaia Euphoria)