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Is your brother alive? Maybe ask him to choose a name, if honouring him is really the goal. He could make a list of options you and your husband can pick from. I guess my advice is "talk to him about it".

Just to clarify, it was my idea to use my brother's name, but it's my husband that doesn't like my brother's full name. So, I'm trying to come up with a compromise. Plus, my brother typically goes by Steve.

I think you and your husband should use a first name you both love, and use Stephen as a middle name.

doesn't your brother have a middle name?

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Why not use that, or his last name (assuming the baby won't have that for a surname)?
Sven seems a bit of a stretch, and Stevie is sickly cute, and ridiculous if pronounced with a short e.

I don't like stevy at all, Id just use Stephen, it's a mn and a honour name, just use the full name

This message was edited 2/2/2024, 11:12 PM

My honest opinion - like, if this were me and not someone else - is that it's just vanity to refuse to use the full name and yet pretend to honor the godfather. I'd say to myself (or my husband): oh, stop it. Honoring the godfather makes it not about you and your tastes. Just use the full name.
Maybe I'm weird, but I used my dad's name as my son's middle name to honor my memory of my dad, and I don't like the name itself, as a name. I thought - who am I to decide it's not a good name? My grandmother used it. Dad lived his whole life by it. He probably didn't like the name a whole lot either, but so what, it was his name. I get to express my taste with my son's first name, and if I wanted to do that with his middle name too, I could just do it...but trying to do both things at once, just does not work for me. I could never kid myself that Sven honored Stephen.

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Anyway about you though! ... I think you can do whatever feels right to you. Do you feel great about using Sven or Stevy? Then use one of them. Your brother will very likely understand completely. He'll also probably understand if you don't honor him at all with the name.

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Or you could bestow two middle names. Make the first middle name be something you just like as a middle name, and also put Stephen on the paperwork as a second middle, to cast a spell of connection while keeping the pleasure of choosing a fn-mn combo.

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I think Sven is a good middle name. I don't think Stevy is very good - unless that's what you actually call your brother.

This message was edited 2/2/2024, 9:09 PM

I'd think about which nickname flows best with the first name.

There are lots of translations of the name that you could use; Stefan and Étienne are two that are quite attractive.