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HelpIf you had a difficult-to-pronounce name...
Knowing your personality type, would you be the type to get frustrated when people don’t get it right, and work with them and correct them until they’ve got it? Or would you be the type to just let it go, and answer to whatever they call you? Would it depend on who the person was?
I’d be a correcter for sure, but I’d try to do it as tactfully as possible.
I’d be a correcter for sure, but I’d try to do it as tactfully as possible.
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It really depends on why they're mispronouncing it. A lot of French-speaking people pronounce my first name incorrectly because they have trouble with the "th-" sound. I don't bother correcting them because I know they aren't doing it on purpose and the sound doesn't exist in their language. But when people insist on calling me Sam or Sammy, despite having been corrected, then I get frustrated and annoyed. I wouldn't answer to them.
My last name is always mispronounced. Every. Single. Time. As long as the attempt makes linguistic sense, I don't bother correcting people. If they leave out syllables or insert random sounds, then I correct them. It's hard though because even when I tell people how to pronounce my last name, they still get it wrong. I understand now why my grandpa and my dad allowed people to pronounce it like a common Scottish last name even though our last name is not pronounced that way at all.
Ultimately, I'm more likely to be silently frustrated and just accept that my name will never be pronounced correctly.
My last name is always mispronounced. Every. Single. Time. As long as the attempt makes linguistic sense, I don't bother correcting people. If they leave out syllables or insert random sounds, then I correct them. It's hard though because even when I tell people how to pronounce my last name, they still get it wrong. I understand now why my grandpa and my dad allowed people to pronounce it like a common Scottish last name even though our last name is not pronounced that way at all.
Ultimately, I'm more likely to be silently frustrated and just accept that my name will never be pronounced correctly.
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I would choose names that would not be too difficult in the environment in which my child would likely grow up so they didn’t feel like an outsider. It’s a personal choice.
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I literally had my name said wrong all through primary school, and then half right, half wrong in secondary, all because I was too shy to correc5 them at first and then felt too awkward after a while. I go by a nn now (for other reasons too), so don’t have the problem. It was a little annoying, but I got used to it and didn’t really care. I kind of liked that people couldn’t say it, made me feel interesting and different haha.
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I've got a difficult to pronounce last name. It's not impossible, but it's also not intuitive to most people. I only really correct them if it's going to come up a lot. If it's a person who is only going to say my name a few times, I'm probably going to leave it.
Also, I often go by "Maggie", but in loud rooms or hard of hearing people assume it's "Megan". I've answered to Megan many times.
Also, I often go by "Maggie", but in loud rooms or hard of hearing people assume it's "Megan". I've answered to Megan many times.
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My name is Mara (MAHR-uh), and typically, people will ask if they pronounced it correctly, giving me an opportunity to correct them without being rude about it. If they don't ask, I usually don't correct them, and then it leads to situations such as when one of my teachers referred to me as MY-ruh for an entire semester until his wife (also one of my teachers) corrected him...
Since I moved to the South, I've noticed people usually guess pronunciation correctly down here, as opposed to the MA (as in map or mat)-ruh and MEHR-uh of the Northeast.
Since I moved to the South, I've noticed people usually guess pronunciation correctly down here, as opposed to the MA (as in map or mat)-ruh and MEHR-uh of the Northeast.
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My niece's name is Mara, pronounced with what you call the "map or mat" pronunciation. However, my stepmother persisted in pronouncing it MAHR-uh. When my niece was a baby, my sister (Mara's mother) said she didn't mind our stepmother pronouncing it that way. She said the pronunciation didn't bother her. So I said I would pronounce it MAHR-uh. This was during a week-long trip that my sister, Mara, my two kids, and I were taking together. But after one day of hearing me say "MAHR-uh", my sister told me to stop, lol. I've never pronounced it that way since.
Anyway, I don't think that any of these pronunciations are correct or incorrect.
Anyway, I don't think that any of these pronunciations are correct or incorrect.
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I'd be a correcter too, but it would also depend on who the person was and my mood. I would be less likely to correct someone I'd only briefly.
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My name isn't hard to say or spell, but when I'm on the phone, people mishear it ALL THE TIME, especially my last name! It starts with a W and is one syllable, and people will mishear it as Wade, Weiss, White, and other W last names that aren't mine. I have to bite my tongue to keep from blowing my top every time. lol For my first name, the most frequent one I get is Bethany.
Whenever this happens, I always correct them, and if done repeatedly, I always have to resort to spelling it out: S as in Sam, T as in Tom, E as in elephant, P as in Paul, H as in horse... They usually get it after the first the first few letters, though, but it's still annoying!
Whenever this happens, I always correct them, and if done repeatedly, I always have to resort to spelling it out: S as in Sam, T as in Tom, E as in elephant, P as in Paul, H as in horse... They usually get it after the first the first few letters, though, but it's still annoying!
This message was edited 3/17/2020, 11:16 AM
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I spend an inordinate time explaining my daughter's name is Miriam, not Mary, Marian, or Mariam. I spent a good bit of time explaining that my name was Haven, not Hailey, Hannah, Hayden, etc. It's gotten trendier and therefore people are more familiar with it. I still often find myself saying "Haven, like a safe haven" And my maiden name was incredibly difficult for people to pronounce and spell.
So yes, I correct people - unless I'm in line or at a place where the social interaction will last for minutes or seconds.
So yes, I correct people - unless I'm in line or at a place where the social interaction will last for minutes or seconds.
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I don't have a hard to pronounce name, but because of the spelling, people mispronounce it, all the time. I correct. I don't do it in an impolite way, but I hate being called by anything other than my name. Drives me nuts.
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I'm Marjolijn and I live in an environment where people have never heard of my name before.
I appreciate any effort to get my name right. I only dislike people substituting my name for a similar one without asking, like calling me Marilyn instead of making any attempt to get my name right.
If someone really has trouble with it, I usually tell them they can call me Marjoram (or Marjolaine if they're French) which would be a translation of my name, which is different and totally fine by me.
I appreciate any effort to get my name right. I only dislike people substituting my name for a similar one without asking, like calling me Marilyn instead of making any attempt to get my name right.
If someone really has trouble with it, I usually tell them they can call me Marjoram (or Marjolaine if they're French) which would be a translation of my name, which is different and totally fine by me.
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I do have a frequently mispronounced surname. Usually, DH and/or I correct if it's easy to casually mention "it's actually X, not Y." If it's just in passing or we don't want to divert the conversation we may let it go.
First names seem more personal. I think I'd be a lot quicker to correct, though I'd keep it short and unobtrusive as much as possible. If it were someone I was unlikely to speak to again/often, I might just let it slide. I could also see myself, especially when I was younger, getting in a situation where I was too socially intimidated to speak up the first time someone got it wrong and then not knowing how to bring it up after. If I had to keep correcting one person, I'd probably get frustrated with them - unless it were just that my name had a sound they don't usually make in their language, and I could tell they were trying still.
First names seem more personal. I think I'd be a lot quicker to correct, though I'd keep it short and unobtrusive as much as possible. If it were someone I was unlikely to speak to again/often, I might just let it slide. I could also see myself, especially when I was younger, getting in a situation where I was too socially intimidated to speak up the first time someone got it wrong and then not knowing how to bring it up after. If I had to keep correcting one person, I'd probably get frustrated with them - unless it were just that my name had a sound they don't usually make in their language, and I could tell they were trying still.
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I'd get tired of pronouncing and spelling it for people, but I wouldn't get annoyed with the people misunderstanding it unless 1. The name was actually not that unusual; for instance if my name was Suzette and people kept calling me Susan that would annoy me. or 2. The same people kept screwing it up.
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People call me Carolyn instead of Caroline all the time. I let it go. I don't *really* care. Though, if I had a name from a marginalized ethnic group and people refused to learn to pronounce it because of their implicit disregard for my heritage, I'd be PISSED.
Eta: if someone close to me called me Carolyn, I'd think they had been abducted by aliens.
Eta: if someone close to me called me Carolyn, I'd think they had been abducted by aliens.
This message was edited 3/17/2020, 4:34 AM
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I’d just correct politely with a “It’s actually JAZ-men.”
On another note, I’m honestly pleasantly surprised no one has ever called me jas-MINE with a long i and that it’s rarely spelled wrong.
On another note, I’m honestly pleasantly surprised no one has ever called me jas-MINE with a long i and that it’s rarely spelled wrong.
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I think I'd be the correcter, but I can't be sure, since my name is probably the most common one in the world.
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My name is one of those names and I get a different pronunciation every time. Sometimes people have repeatedly done it and it’s annoying seeing as you’ve bothered to know their name but they can’t even remember how to say yours. And surely it’s easier to remember because it’s unusual. Some people even stop half way through my name hoping that could be a nickname lol. I usually answer if someone says it wrong but correct them afterwards.
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I'd definitely get frustrated and work with them and correct them. I know this because I went through something very similar with my maiden surname. It was actually not difficult to pronounce, but it was unusual and ethnic, and people tended to blank when they first heard it and when they saw it written, and then mispronounce it. I found it frustrating to no end.
However, the exception would be if I were talking to a person I didn't know, had never spoken to before, and would never speak to again. I know this because I work on the phone and in the course of my work, my first name, although again not difficult to pronounce, is frequently misheard as Janet or Candice, and once in a while as Shannon. I have found it not worth the effort to correct this, when I'm never going to speak to this person again.
However, the exception would be if I were talking to a person I didn't know, had never spoken to before, and would never speak to again. I know this because I work on the phone and in the course of my work, my first name, although again not difficult to pronounce, is frequently misheard as Janet or Candice, and once in a while as Shannon. I have found it not worth the effort to correct this, when I'm never going to speak to this person again.
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Depends on my relationship to them.
If it's limited and not very personal - the barista, one of my kids' teachers, a contractor - I tend to let it slide and just be amused.
If it's someone I work with or an in-law or a neighbor, I just say my name aloud, as soon as they say the wrong name and I realize they mean me. I interrupt them with it, while smiling. Upspeak it, as if I'm saying "____ is what you mean, right?" Repeat as needed, no limit.
If it's limited and not very personal - the barista, one of my kids' teachers, a contractor - I tend to let it slide and just be amused.
If it's someone I work with or an in-law or a neighbor, I just say my name aloud, as soon as they say the wrong name and I realize they mean me. I interrupt them with it, while smiling. Upspeak it, as if I'm saying "____ is what you mean, right?" Repeat as needed, no limit.
This message was edited 3/17/2020, 8:02 PM
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My name isn't hard to pronounce, but I've been called Troy, Tony, Cory, Lori, Vanessa, Virginia, Virginie, Vicky, and probably other things...none of which are my name...because they misread it or misheard it or just forgot. I only correct people if I'm going to be around them continuously - let's say - if I'll be interacting with them for a week or more, or if we're around other people to whom the mistake is obvious, then I'll correct them. Otherwise, I wouldn't bother.
I only get frustrated when after correcting people, they continue to use the wrong name; like if they call me Vicky even if I've made a point of saying 'if you'd prefer to use a nickname, it's Tory', that's frustrating. In that case, I wouldn't answer or react like they're saying my name, because they're not, intentionally.
I think I'd be tempted not to respond if I had a difficult-to-pronounce name and someone kept getting it wrong over and over, but it'd depend if it was truly difficult (like had sounds that didn't exist in their native language), or if it was just strange...if it was just strange, then I'd expect people to make an effort to get it right, once I corrected them. But it might depend on whether or not I liked the "correct" pronunciation.
Tory is almost always misspelled. I never correct people about that, even when it's family doing it or people I talk to regularly, because I get it; it's a weird spelling that not even I like. I correct people when they misspell my surname, which also happens often, because that's more likely to be for official paperwork.
I only get frustrated when after correcting people, they continue to use the wrong name; like if they call me Vicky even if I've made a point of saying 'if you'd prefer to use a nickname, it's Tory', that's frustrating. In that case, I wouldn't answer or react like they're saying my name, because they're not, intentionally.
I think I'd be tempted not to respond if I had a difficult-to-pronounce name and someone kept getting it wrong over and over, but it'd depend if it was truly difficult (like had sounds that didn't exist in their native language), or if it was just strange...if it was just strange, then I'd expect people to make an effort to get it right, once I corrected them. But it might depend on whether or not I liked the "correct" pronunciation.
Tory is almost always misspelled. I never correct people about that, even when it's family doing it or people I talk to regularly, because I get it; it's a weird spelling that not even I like. I correct people when they misspell my surname, which also happens often, because that's more likely to be for official paperwork.
This message was edited 3/16/2020, 10:53 PM
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I’d definitely get annoyed.
I’m not a person with a lot of patience... I have plenty of patience with kids and (nice) old people. But annoying kids, bratty kids, rude old people, rude people any and ever, etc... I just don’t have lots of patience or longsuffering. Lol
I would correct them and then get very annoyed over a period of time and pick a nickname.
I’m not a person with a lot of patience... I have plenty of patience with kids and (nice) old people. But annoying kids, bratty kids, rude old people, rude people any and ever, etc... I just don’t have lots of patience or longsuffering. Lol
I would correct them and then get very annoyed over a period of time and pick a nickname.
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