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It's always seemed dull and dumpy next to Caroline. I guess it doesn't help that I had a middle school friend named Carolyn who was rather strange and who my mother always thought wasn't good enough for me. She was overweight, had frizzy hair, and dressed oddly. She was an only child and her parents were of some religion that forbade celebrating Christmas or having a TV, so when she came to our house she'd stare mesmerized at the TV no matter what kind of worthless old crap was showing.

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I love the way that names sometimes remind me of my past, so I appreciate anyone who bears with me through this stuff.

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Anyway, I've always remembered what Carolyn told me about how she received her name: Her father's name was Carl and her mother's name was Evelyn, so they considered Carolyn a mash-up of their names.