View Message

I agree with your response - exponentially. While some nick-names may just be short forms of the formal, Nick-names also offer a choice against the formal for the name bearer, so if a girl or guy feels estranged by this quality, s/he may obscure the distinction. Also if parents or guardians realize that the child responds better or prefers the shorter nick-name, the shorter name would more naturally become the moniker. Another possibility, and this one hits close to home, is that the unexpected quality of the name (gender) is not the reason that the person bears this name, as I myself was named after a recently departed aunt, so the idea "let's give him a girl's name" sustained less merit in the wake of recent tragedy, which, through periods of grief, would impose conflict on one already in mourning, and even if considered, might not be suggested at all by the less affected parent. Yet in any situation, a parent or name giver may simply like a name--and the partner might have already agreed to it, assuming that it would be for a girl. When asked about my own unique name assignment last year, I did not easily offer the explanation, as natural conditions of loss, consolation, and remembrance--and the continuity of it all surround my name; yet while of course there is more to it, this is another reason that I cherish it--yet also guard it from degradation, and endeavor such for other names, as I do.

---

While writing this, I tried to remove myself from the situation and involve anyone with a unique name, but I found myself reverting back to my own name & my understanding of the circumstance which involved its assignment; so I found this response to be cathartic. As unique as my name might be, there is natural empathy Behind the Name--but also regular, daily, normal human interaction, which during periods of loss, which later perpetuates, bears more upon the heart than the black and white characters which dispel it.

---

When young, I always thought Brett to be a name for girls / females, due to the "ett" sound--i.e. the noun "barrette", Paulette, Collette...; as any guy named Brett would have 'girl's name' as I do. I still have this perception, though I fully understand now that it is more frequently used as a name for males.