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I think Cat as a nn for Scarlett is a stretch and fairly contrived as well. I mean, if she just kind of fell into being called Cat because say, she liked cats, or acted like a cat, or was a climber like a cat is, that'd be one thing. But to predetermine that you want to give her a name that really has no connection with Cat, which you then plan to use to honor a Kathy? No, it just doesn't work that well.

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Katrina, Katherine, Kathleen, Caitlin, Catalina, Katarina, Catriona (which I hate for its over-the-top Irishness and the unnecessary O but which would definitely fit in with your sons' names) are the only names I can think of that lend themselves easily to Cat as a nn. I do know a Kristen who is called Kitty by her family.