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HelpI always wanted to explain this :) [m]
in reply to a message by MoonAgeDaydreamer
I'll do my best at explaining:
Simply on Michael: I want to use Michael for a name, and I don't like it for a boy [except MJ/MJF) no matter how much I try. So I just said I'd use it for a girl.
In General Why I like "Gender-Switched" as it's called: I would not use a name male name on a boy just because it's masculine or feminine on a girl just because its feminine. I wouldn't use a feminine/male version for the sake of it being a female/male version of whatever the name is I like, especially if I don't like the name I don't see the point. I don't see the point in picking another name because the name in question would be for a certain gender only, if I like the name, and love it regardless I would use it I wouldn't toss it out because of something as I see it minor as that. I would only not consider something if it gave the child tremendous known-fact-for-sure teasing. In that case I might consider it for a middle name.
Does this mean I'd name a girl Robert or John? Nope. Those don't appeal to me for girls, and I strictly see Robert for a boy because it appeals to me for a boy only. Would I name my son Rebecca, or Sarah? Nope as those don't appeal to me on boys. Rebecca I dislike in general, and Sarah I love for a girl. I get excited when I hear the names in general though regardless of gender.
I can only speak for myself, but: I don't do it to fit in the crowd or because it's the "in/trendy" thing or it's "cutsy", or "strong" for a girl or whatever the like. Whatever gender I keep coming back to, and getting all smiley on that's the gender the name appeals to me on, and like it/use it on/ Example: Hazel appeals for me on a boy only. Hazel doesn't appeal to me on a girl at all, I cannot picture it on a girl ever it's odd to me on one even though it's mostly used on girls. I get so excited to see boy Hazels, but I get all "eh" or "it's ok" feeling on a girl. Elliott for example I get excited equally for both genders, so that's what I use it on both.
Sometimes the name will suit one gender for me, then a few years I will only like it for the other or for both. It just depends.
Hopefully that explains it better where I'm coming from it might not make a lot of sense to others, but it makes sense to me :).
As for middle names:
Michael Eliza - cute thanks
Simply on Michael: I want to use Michael for a name, and I don't like it for a boy [except MJ/MJF) no matter how much I try. So I just said I'd use it for a girl.
In General Why I like "Gender-Switched" as it's called: I would not use a name male name on a boy just because it's masculine or feminine on a girl just because its feminine. I wouldn't use a feminine/male version for the sake of it being a female/male version of whatever the name is I like, especially if I don't like the name I don't see the point. I don't see the point in picking another name because the name in question would be for a certain gender only, if I like the name, and love it regardless I would use it I wouldn't toss it out because of something as I see it minor as that. I would only not consider something if it gave the child tremendous known-fact-for-sure teasing. In that case I might consider it for a middle name.
Does this mean I'd name a girl Robert or John? Nope. Those don't appeal to me for girls, and I strictly see Robert for a boy because it appeals to me for a boy only. Would I name my son Rebecca, or Sarah? Nope as those don't appeal to me on boys. Rebecca I dislike in general, and Sarah I love for a girl. I get excited when I hear the names in general though regardless of gender.
I can only speak for myself, but: I don't do it to fit in the crowd or because it's the "in/trendy" thing or it's "cutsy", or "strong" for a girl or whatever the like. Whatever gender I keep coming back to, and getting all smiley on that's the gender the name appeals to me on, and like it/use it on/ Example: Hazel appeals for me on a boy only. Hazel doesn't appeal to me on a girl at all, I cannot picture it on a girl ever it's odd to me on one even though it's mostly used on girls. I get so excited to see boy Hazels, but I get all "eh" or "it's ok" feeling on a girl. Elliott for example I get excited equally for both genders, so that's what I use it on both.
Sometimes the name will suit one gender for me, then a few years I will only like it for the other or for both. It just depends.
Hopefully that explains it better where I'm coming from it might not make a lot of sense to others, but it makes sense to me :).
As for middle names:
Michael Eliza - cute thanks
This message was edited 6/30/2009, 9:34 PM
Archived Thread - replies disabled
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Replies
I love your mind Sabrina :)
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thanks :)
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None of that has anything to do with the message your sending, not only to the child but to everyone. Naming your son Hazel would result in the same thing, in addition to merciless teasing.
I guess my real gripe is with that very latent misogyny that's oh so popular today.
I guess my real gripe is with that very latent misogyny that's oh so popular today.
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I think Hazel works great on both sexes.
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Well, I can't help what others think themselves. That's why I find it so saddening that people really are that well judgmental, and if I dare say closed-off to different names or styles. It shouldn't matter what the person's name is really when what really matters is the person themselves. I don't get why people think it's okay to make fun of others weather it be their name, or what have you. It's cruel, and it saddening that majority of society is like this. There would be no teasing, mocking, rude comments, etc if people were more accepting about names, and taught to respect others.
Having an unusual name (Hazel even on a boy) doesn't mean automatic teasing, it could, yes, but more often then not it usually is deeper then that (I do think that Hazel might encounter teasing yes, but people survive it). If it is only based on a name then it just shows how the person making fun truly is in the inside. Yes, sometimes certain names are funny, but go out of your way to make a person feel ashamed to have that name is disheartening.
That's why when I have children I'll explain you always respect people, and it's not a person's name that matters weather it's Joseph or Diamond it matters how they are as a person, and what they are on the inside. I can only do what's right for me, and my kids of course I don't want my kids to be teased, but I can't stop that if they are going to be even if my son's name is Hazel or Edward.
wow that was long, lol :)
Having an unusual name (Hazel even on a boy) doesn't mean automatic teasing, it could, yes, but more often then not it usually is deeper then that (I do think that Hazel might encounter teasing yes, but people survive it). If it is only based on a name then it just shows how the person making fun truly is in the inside. Yes, sometimes certain names are funny, but go out of your way to make a person feel ashamed to have that name is disheartening.
That's why when I have children I'll explain you always respect people, and it's not a person's name that matters weather it's Joseph or Diamond it matters how they are as a person, and what they are on the inside. I can only do what's right for me, and my kids of course I don't want my kids to be teased, but I can't stop that if they are going to be even if my son's name is Hazel or Edward.
wow that was long, lol :)
This message was edited 6/30/2009, 10:09 PM
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You can always explain this concept to your child, but that doesn't mean that other parents are explaining it to their children. I understand that kids will be teased for anything, even if they have a name like John or Mary but I just think as a parent, you would want to diminish chances that your child will be teased instead of contributing to it.
If it makes you feel any better, Hazel on a boy is very cool. It was actually a boys name at one time but people don't realize it. It was big in the day of male Pearlies, Shirleys, and Marions.
If it makes you feel any better, Hazel on a boy is very cool. It was actually a boys name at one time but people don't realize it. It was big in the day of male Pearlies, Shirleys, and Marions.
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:) True, Hazel was used I believe in 1800/1900's for men
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I'm sorry if it seems like I'm picking on you, I'm just trying to make sense of this concept.
You wouldn't stop bathing and just say "Oh I wish everyone could be more open-minded and accepting of different odor styles," would you? Then why would you deliberately give a child a name that's guaranteed to be misconstrued and cause problems?
Yes, people who make fun of other people suck. Hearing that is cold comfort after hours and hours of "Your a girl named MICHAEL? HAHAHA!"
You wouldn't stop bathing and just say "Oh I wish everyone could be more open-minded and accepting of different odor styles," would you? Then why would you deliberately give a child a name that's guaranteed to be misconstrued and cause problems?
Yes, people who make fun of other people suck. Hearing that is cold comfort after hours and hours of "Your a girl named MICHAEL? HAHAHA!"
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No it's okay :) I'll try to explain [m]
You wouldn't stop bathing and just say "Oh I wish everyone could be more open-minded and accepting of different odor styles," would you? No, I wouldn't, but I don't view that as the same thing as naming a child.
Then why would you deliberately give a child a name that's guaranteed to be misconstrued and cause problems? Let me put it this way: If *I* myself would hate being named it, I don't use it. Children can't pick their own names (whatever it may be). So that's what I go by. I honestly would not mind one bit being named Michael, yes there's the "your a girl", "you sure it's not Michaela", etc. Yes, my daughter might hate, and despise being called Michael, but my daughter Scarlet might as well.
I myself have a name that over the years has caused a lot of problems, and tons of teasing from it. I know from experience, I survived it, and I adore my name. Yes I admit I hated it when I was younger. Not one person spelled it right, I always was called something else either Serena or Samantha. No one could say it either. I always get the stupid witch reference which I despise.
So you are probably thinking "Then why make your kid go through all that too"? Because it's really not that bad, really. Annoying as heck sometimes yes, but I wouldn't have any other name. My mother no one ever gets her name right at all, yet she said she likes it, same for my friends Lynn, Robin, Loren, Chelsea who are male, same for my friend Season, Jordan, Amber who are girls. People just deal with it. I don't know how else to explain it.
If they hate their names badly enough they can change it when they are 18 then, but majority don't. It's just something going through all that that makes it just different I can't explain it. Not everyone, but a lot so it seems.
You wouldn't stop bathing and just say "Oh I wish everyone could be more open-minded and accepting of different odor styles," would you? No, I wouldn't, but I don't view that as the same thing as naming a child.
Then why would you deliberately give a child a name that's guaranteed to be misconstrued and cause problems? Let me put it this way: If *I* myself would hate being named it, I don't use it. Children can't pick their own names (whatever it may be). So that's what I go by. I honestly would not mind one bit being named Michael, yes there's the "your a girl", "you sure it's not Michaela", etc. Yes, my daughter might hate, and despise being called Michael, but my daughter Scarlet might as well.
I myself have a name that over the years has caused a lot of problems, and tons of teasing from it. I know from experience, I survived it, and I adore my name. Yes I admit I hated it when I was younger. Not one person spelled it right, I always was called something else either Serena or Samantha. No one could say it either. I always get the stupid witch reference which I despise.
So you are probably thinking "Then why make your kid go through all that too"? Because it's really not that bad, really. Annoying as heck sometimes yes, but I wouldn't have any other name. My mother no one ever gets her name right at all, yet she said she likes it, same for my friends Lynn, Robin, Loren, Chelsea who are male, same for my friend Season, Jordan, Amber who are girls. People just deal with it. I don't know how else to explain it.
If they hate their names badly enough they can change it when they are 18 then, but majority don't. It's just something going through all that that makes it just different I can't explain it. Not everyone, but a lot so it seems.
This message was edited 6/30/2009, 10:24 PM
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Oh, believe me, I know the hard name game. My name's not even on this site!
But my original point has been muddled, so I shall drop it. To each his own.
But my original point has been muddled, so I shall drop it. To each his own.
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Truce :) and sorry about that :/ geting your message muddled
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Yup :) I said my name Ann once I forgot for what , LOL I didn't use my FN
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Personally, I've known a few oddly-named people that I think a girl named Michael is absolutely normal compared to (girls names Iamunique and Jazzofmine, among others) and people didn't tease them about their names because thay knew them as people. Now I have known some people who had problems; my friend's brother Galen- a perfectly normal male name- got teased because the first syllable of his name was "gay". He got teased to much that he started failing in school; then he sartd going by his middle name and that worked out fine. You never know what people are going to find to tease you about; maybe it's your name, your clothes, etc. If someone is the type of person who teases people they will tease you anyway, no matter whether they can tease you about your name or not. I'd just name your kids whatever you want to, and then if it gives them problems make sure you have something to fall back on.
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