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HelpRe: If I had one complaint
in reply to a message by Megan
To begin with, I did not say that Evey and Ariel were "pitable," I said that if there was anyone who actually got OFFENDED because someone reposted information (and my guess would be that nobody really would - which was my POINT) that that person is one that I feel sorry for because there are so many bigger fish to fry in life. Not once did I say that anyone had to agree with me. I don't care if you agree or not, I am entitled to my opinion as you are yours.
You want the courtesy of a PM, but you do not give the original poster the same courtesy. Your comments did come off as snippy, particularly because both of you felt the need to correct the poster. I would think that for the original poster this might make them a little gun shy about posting new topics. I don't think this was your original intent, but I feel that your responses were off putting and not helpful, even if you meant them to be.
If there are in fact rules about these things (and there are not, because I looked) then they should be posted in a sticky or in the rules and FAQ section where new people can access that information.
If you really do not want the new pasts to push down the others, why not simply ignore the original post? Then if people really are done talking about it they can also ignore it and if someone does respond, then that would be a sign that people want to continue the conversation. Sometimes it is easier and more interesting to read and respond to a smaller thread anyway, when threads get huge it seems like thoughts and comments get lost.
Finally, there is nothing cowardly in publicly supporting another or defending an opinion. And just because something has always been done, does not make it the best way.
You want the courtesy of a PM, but you do not give the original poster the same courtesy. Your comments did come off as snippy, particularly because both of you felt the need to correct the poster. I would think that for the original poster this might make them a little gun shy about posting new topics. I don't think this was your original intent, but I feel that your responses were off putting and not helpful, even if you meant them to be.
If there are in fact rules about these things (and there are not, because I looked) then they should be posted in a sticky or in the rules and FAQ section where new people can access that information.
If you really do not want the new pasts to push down the others, why not simply ignore the original post? Then if people really are done talking about it they can also ignore it and if someone does respond, then that would be a sign that people want to continue the conversation. Sometimes it is easier and more interesting to read and respond to a smaller thread anyway, when threads get huge it seems like thoughts and comments get lost.
Finally, there is nothing cowardly in publicly supporting another or defending an opinion. And just because something has always been done, does not make it the best way.
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Replies
"if there was anyone" ... Backbiting is backbiting, and indirectness is characteristic of backbiting comments, making them deniable just so. You put someone down -- a hypothetical person? Uh huh.
Moving on...
The "comments came off as snippy" to you. That's fine, you're entitled to your opinion and to speak it. Perhaps a lot of people agree with you. But you should qualify it as an opinion. In my opinion, the 2 posters who responded with directions about the site appeared helpful and polite, not making a personal attack. In my opinion, the negative responses to them look like a weird defensive overreaction - I feel I'm being told I can't breathe the air here, if you're offended I pity you, calling it the fury, and the like.
As to whether posts are ignored when they're repeat topics -- it's a good point; that's what most people do. But it's also a good point that the info about searching should be offered to people who obviously aren't aware of it. Not only for the OP's benefit but for everyone's. There has always been arguing on this board about whether "self-moderation" of the board is appropriate (because of people taking it as "bullying" or "snippy" or whatever), or whether hard-ass moderation would be better.
Do you think it would be preferable if Suzie Q's post had been removed and a PM sent advising her about the topic being old? I personally am not excited about that - I think it'd be more off-putting than other posters pointing out why the topic won't see any replies, and nearly as off-putting as seeing no responses to the post and not understanding why (which could incline some people to repost it yet again). But not everyone agrees with me.
Come on folks, let's have it out again - no moderation of the board, self-moderation of the board, or strict moderation?
Moving on...
The "comments came off as snippy" to you. That's fine, you're entitled to your opinion and to speak it. Perhaps a lot of people agree with you. But you should qualify it as an opinion. In my opinion, the 2 posters who responded with directions about the site appeared helpful and polite, not making a personal attack. In my opinion, the negative responses to them look like a weird defensive overreaction - I feel I'm being told I can't breathe the air here, if you're offended I pity you, calling it the fury, and the like.
As to whether posts are ignored when they're repeat topics -- it's a good point; that's what most people do. But it's also a good point that the info about searching should be offered to people who obviously aren't aware of it. Not only for the OP's benefit but for everyone's. There has always been arguing on this board about whether "self-moderation" of the board is appropriate (because of people taking it as "bullying" or "snippy" or whatever), or whether hard-ass moderation would be better.
Do you think it would be preferable if Suzie Q's post had been removed and a PM sent advising her about the topic being old? I personally am not excited about that - I think it'd be more off-putting than other posters pointing out why the topic won't see any replies, and nearly as off-putting as seeing no responses to the post and not understanding why (which could incline some people to repost it yet again). But not everyone agrees with me.
Come on folks, let's have it out again - no moderation of the board, self-moderation of the board, or strict moderation?
This message was edited 5/15/2007, 9:36 AM
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No moderation is decidedly not the way to go. I do not think that removing her message and a PM would have been ideal, either, because she did not post originally as a registered member; it's just not practical. I think a lock and a reply as a moderator would be a good approach because:
It will be consistent. That way, no one can say that they are being unfairly picked on. Granted, right now, people still can say that we do this to everyone, but since it is different posters at different times, it can seem like BtN is against someone. That is not to say that I disagree with it; given the way things are, I would rather see the self-moderation like this than nothing. Anyway, a reply by a mod wearing a "mod hat" would be most effective, I think, because that way, people can separate the poster from the moderator rather than think that posters just always reprimand like this.
Honestly, I think you need help. You're the only active mod right now, and I know you prefer not to be strict about it, but then, we have things like this. I think that some sort of medium needs to be reached. Not that I do not think you are effective -- I think your replies are fair, level-headed, and make good judgment calls -- but I do think that more needs to be done in addition.
It will be consistent. That way, no one can say that they are being unfairly picked on. Granted, right now, people still can say that we do this to everyone, but since it is different posters at different times, it can seem like BtN is against someone. That is not to say that I disagree with it; given the way things are, I would rather see the self-moderation like this than nothing. Anyway, a reply by a mod wearing a "mod hat" would be most effective, I think, because that way, people can separate the poster from the moderator rather than think that posters just always reprimand like this.
Honestly, I think you need help. You're the only active mod right now, and I know you prefer not to be strict about it, but then, we have things like this. I think that some sort of medium needs to be reached. Not that I do not think you are effective -- I think your replies are fair, level-headed, and make good judgment calls -- but I do think that more needs to be done in addition.
This message was edited 5/15/2007, 10:09 AM
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