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Help[Opinions] Do you feel bad when someone “steals” one of your faves?
My cousin just recently had a daughter named Harper. Congrats to her.
Anyways Harper has always been a major guilty pleasure to me. Even though the odds of me having my own kids are virtually zilch, and I probably wouldn’t use it anyways, I always wanted to use Harper for a pet. Now I’m thinking even using it for a pet is off the table. Has anything like this happened to anybody? What did you do?
Anyways Harper has always been a major guilty pleasure to me. Even though the odds of me having my own kids are virtually zilch, and I probably wouldn’t use it anyways, I always wanted to use Harper for a pet. Now I’m thinking even using it for a pet is off the table. Has anything like this happened to anybody? What did you do?
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Yes, it's upsetting when weird names I like start getting popular, especially when those same people turned up their noses at those names initially.
Andromeda is my favorite name and has been for ... always.
I see it's gaining traction and it's annoying.
Sebastian is another name I've liked for decades. It's too late now.
For the record, my Shih Tzu is already named Andromeda (for 7 years). Take that!
Andromeda is my favorite name and has been for ... always.
I see it's gaining traction and it's annoying.
Sebastian is another name I've liked for decades. It's too late now.
For the record, my Shih Tzu is already named Andromeda (for 7 years). Take that!
This message was edited 10/7/2024, 7:08 AM
No, I don't think so.
I figure if you'd really wanted a pet named Harper, you'd already have one. And then you could maybe have a laugh about your cousin using your dog's name for her kid.
But really, I don't see anything to feel bad over. Harper was a guilty pleasure anyway, which implies you'd never actually name a child that even if you had a child. And it's so popular right now anyway ...
I figure if you'd really wanted a pet named Harper, you'd already have one. And then you could maybe have a laugh about your cousin using your dog's name for her kid.
But really, I don't see anything to feel bad over. Harper was a guilty pleasure anyway, which implies you'd never actually name a child that even if you had a child. And it's so popular right now anyway ...
When my cousin chose the nickname "Nico" for her son Nicholas I was a little salty about it, even though I knew I wouldn't be having kids any time soon. But after 6 years I'm no longer interested in the name anymore, and it suits my little cousin well.
Although, my name style wasn't fully established back then, so if someone close to me were to choose one of my top 3 names now I'd probably be pretty upset.
Although, my name style wasn't fully established back then, so if someone close to me were to choose one of my top 3 names now I'd probably be pretty upset.
No, I'd be glad I liked the name. It's such a miserly feeling to dislike a baby's name. And I'd probably be amazed if it was something rare enough (that I could have imagined it as mine). I'm not planning to have kids, anyway.
I do remember when I was a youngster thinking that if I had a daughter, I'd maybe name her Charlotte after my grandma. That was back before it was in the top 50 and before the royal baby Charlotte. And then my best friend named her oldest daughter Charlotte! (though it was top 10 at that point, so not that surprising). I was a little bummed but mostly because I hate the NN Charlie (at least, when it's for Charlotte), which is what her daughter goes by. But also I kinda felt like "this name is important to me, and you're just using it because of fashion, the horror" haha; of course, choosing the name for a daughter has made it important to her.
...I wouldn't name a pet something I only slightly liked if I had a cousin named it, though there's so many other names I could use that I'm not bothered by that idea...if by some weird chance, it was my dream to name a toad Hercules, but my cousin named a kid Hercules first, I might still use it for the toad (I doubt they'd care or even know), but I imagine I'd go with something new like Goliath happily enough.
I do remember when I was a youngster thinking that if I had a daughter, I'd maybe name her Charlotte after my grandma. That was back before it was in the top 50 and before the royal baby Charlotte. And then my best friend named her oldest daughter Charlotte! (though it was top 10 at that point, so not that surprising). I was a little bummed but mostly because I hate the NN Charlie (at least, when it's for Charlotte), which is what her daughter goes by. But also I kinda felt like "this name is important to me, and you're just using it because of fashion, the horror" haha; of course, choosing the name for a daughter has made it important to her.
...I wouldn't name a pet something I only slightly liked if I had a cousin named it, though there's so many other names I could use that I'm not bothered by that idea...if by some weird chance, it was my dream to name a toad Hercules, but my cousin named a kid Hercules first, I might still use it for the toad (I doubt they'd care or even know), but I imagine I'd go with something new like Goliath happily enough.
This message was edited 10/6/2024, 9:39 PM
Julia was one of two names I always wanted to give a daughter. The summer before I married (and got pregnant with a daughter!), my friend named a daughter Julia. (We hadn't discussed it so it wasn't like she knew she was "stealing" and anyway I wouldn't have asked her not to use it) I thought it was great, but I was disappointed because I wouldn't any longer be comfortable using the name if I had a daughter.
If anything I am more exasperated by it now than I was then. But, with myself, not with my friend! I think my daughter's name might have actually been Julia, if not for that happening. It's not that I resent not getting to use the name because my friend used it - someone got the name, so that's all good - what irritates me is that I thought it mattered so much, and it turned out not to, because I ended up moving away before my daughter turned two, and losing touch with that friend.
And also, from where I am sitting right now (my non-Julia is just about grown up) ... it would not have mattered even if I had NOT moved away, and we had raised our two Julias as friends. It would have been fine, as long as I and my friend were enough like mature adults to be happy for each other, and not bitter over a name. You can always put a positive spin on people sharing a name because everyone likes it!
(Even if a name is truly unusual and special and was clearly stolen without regard ... like if you & your partner were Sammy and Ray and wanted to name your kid Samiray, and someone close-ish to you "stole" that name right as you were getting into prime time to start a family - I could understand feeling angry about it. But the necessary negative consequences for a second-named Samiray are still zero, in fact! as long as the first one hasn't cultivated a horrible reputation. All you have to do is be positive about what a great name it is.)
If anything I am more exasperated by it now than I was then. But, with myself, not with my friend! I think my daughter's name might have actually been Julia, if not for that happening. It's not that I resent not getting to use the name because my friend used it - someone got the name, so that's all good - what irritates me is that I thought it mattered so much, and it turned out not to, because I ended up moving away before my daughter turned two, and losing touch with that friend.
And also, from where I am sitting right now (my non-Julia is just about grown up) ... it would not have mattered even if I had NOT moved away, and we had raised our two Julias as friends. It would have been fine, as long as I and my friend were enough like mature adults to be happy for each other, and not bitter over a name. You can always put a positive spin on people sharing a name because everyone likes it!
(Even if a name is truly unusual and special and was clearly stolen without regard ... like if you & your partner were Sammy and Ray and wanted to name your kid Samiray, and someone close-ish to you "stole" that name right as you were getting into prime time to start a family - I could understand feeling angry about it. But the necessary negative consequences for a second-named Samiray are still zero, in fact! as long as the first one hasn't cultivated a horrible reputation. All you have to do is be positive about what a great name it is.)
This message was edited 10/6/2024, 3:44 PM
When I was younger I worried about this sort of thing. But then at a certain age I just didn't care anymore. I guess because I figured a lot of my faves are popular for good reason. And that two people having the same name isn't the end of the world.
The only time I get bitter about it is when someone I don't like picks the name. Then I get irrationally annoyed, like, keep that name out of your mouth, how dare you. Pure petty hatred.
The only time I get bitter about it is when someone I don't like picks the name. Then I get irrationally annoyed, like, keep that name out of your mouth, how dare you. Pure petty hatred.
There are some names that I like or love but I will not use them or anything too similar because someone I know is already named it, and I'd like to avoid confusion (assuming I'm not naming children after them) like Ryan, Hayden, Xavier, or Isaiah.
Some of the charm of rare names go away for me when they reach the charts even once. Other names are not rare, or are in fact very popular, meaning that there is a chance that my child won't be the only student in their class with that name.
Seraphina and Sapphire suddenly entered the chart.
Blue has not reached the charts, but Beyonce put the name in the forefront a little more.
Grey is popular in the U.S right now, but not Gray - that's popular in England and Wales.
Tristan, Tate, Savannah, Wilder, and Stella are more popular than I'd like.
It can be annoying but at the end of the day, specific names might really call to me when I actually have children of my own. I might not care about them being "stolen" at all.
Some of the charm of rare names go away for me when they reach the charts even once. Other names are not rare, or are in fact very popular, meaning that there is a chance that my child won't be the only student in their class with that name.
Seraphina and Sapphire suddenly entered the chart.
Blue has not reached the charts, but Beyonce put the name in the forefront a little more.
Grey is popular in the U.S right now, but not Gray - that's popular in England and Wales.
Tristan, Tate, Savannah, Wilder, and Stella are more popular than I'd like.
It can be annoying but at the end of the day, specific names might really call to me when I actually have children of my own. I might not care about them being "stolen" at all.
This message was edited 10/7/2024, 2:31 PM