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Help[Opinions] Jay, as a feminine name (and variants)
Growing up, I'd always thought of Jay as a masculine name, as it was the name of more than one guy in my social circle. Then, it was too minimalist for my taste. (I thought the episode of The Simpsons where Homer learned he had a middle name, because the initial he'd discovered was "J," and finally revealed that his middle name was Jay, was hilarious.)
Fast-forward many years, and I get into the show Midsomer Murders way after it started. Anyway, in one of my favorite episodes that features a slasher obsessed with the 1950s, the village constable helping Barnaby and Troy is a woman named... Jay.
At first, I thought her name was Jane. Nope, they were saying Jay. I wondered if it was the initial "J" they were saying, a nickname for something else (not unlike the Homer Simpson situation). Then I put captions on and confirmed her name was, in fact, Jay. The character is credited as "WPC Jay Nash" (woman police constable). It was the first time I'd ever seen Jay as a woman's name, not a man's. In her case, I imagine the name is related to the jaybird.
After a while, I thought about the name. And I thought... why not? It's similar in sound to both Jane and Jade. Though I'd likely opt for Jaye, or even Jae (which I understand is also an unrelated Korean name), because Jay does still look masculine to me.
Anyway, wdyt?
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www.behindthename.com/pnl/69381/117507
www.behindthename.com/pnl/69381/109399
www.behindthename.com/pnl/69381/132018
Fast-forward many years, and I get into the show Midsomer Murders way after it started. Anyway, in one of my favorite episodes that features a slasher obsessed with the 1950s, the village constable helping Barnaby and Troy is a woman named... Jay.
At first, I thought her name was Jane. Nope, they were saying Jay. I wondered if it was the initial "J" they were saying, a nickname for something else (not unlike the Homer Simpson situation). Then I put captions on and confirmed her name was, in fact, Jay. The character is credited as "WPC Jay Nash" (woman police constable). It was the first time I'd ever seen Jay as a woman's name, not a man's. In her case, I imagine the name is related to the jaybird.
After a while, I thought about the name. And I thought... why not? It's similar in sound to both Jane and Jade. Though I'd likely opt for Jaye, or even Jae (which I understand is also an unrelated Korean name), because Jay does still look masculine to me.
Anyway, wdyt?
***
Please rate my personal name lists:
www.behindthename.com/pnl/69381
www.behindthename.com/pnl/69381/117507
www.behindthename.com/pnl/69381/109399
www.behindthename.com/pnl/69381/132018
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Replies
I met a lady whose first name was Jaye. I think it's fresh and spunky as a woman's name.
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Jay is solidly unisex for me. It's a lot like Lee, Kay, and Ray. It looks slightly masculine on a girl and slightly feminine on a boy, and has that short nicknamey feel without necessarily being short for anything. I think its proper place is as a filler middle name, but I don't mind it as a first name.
As a first name I think it sounds older on a boy and younger/more versatile on a girl, but maybe that's just because I recently met a young female Jay (19-20ish) and I think the only male Jays I've met have been older. But as a nickname it could go easily on any age.
As a first name I think it sounds older on a boy and younger/more versatile on a girl, but maybe that's just because I recently met a young female Jay (19-20ish) and I think the only male Jays I've met have been older. But as a nickname it could go easily on any age.
This message was edited 7/25/2023, 9:53 PM
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Kay is widely used as a female nn, and I've never seen it as Kaye or Kae. I hope I never shall.
Jay is just another initial nn, and like all nns it's probably, and unwisely, been used as a stand-alone name. I don't have any gender expectations when I see it, and I certainly wouldn't mess with the spelling to 'avoid' a non-existent problem.
Jay is just another initial nn, and like all nns it's probably, and unwisely, been used as a stand-alone name. I don't have any gender expectations when I see it, and I certainly wouldn't mess with the spelling to 'avoid' a non-existent problem.
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An aunt of my mother was called Jay (who I think died in the 1960s or 70s).
I think her birth certificate said Jessie, but she went by Jay, at least as an adult, to everybody. Spelled Jay.
So I've always thought of it as unisex. I'm not sure whether I first heard the name for a guy, or the name of my relative. But Aunt Jay is the only female Jay I've ever encountered. I think that's why I prefer it on guys - I've learned to expect a guy, and so I figure others expect a guy. That makes it seem not feminine enough - when I'm thinking about it in the abstract, with no sexed person bearing it.
But if I met a female Jay I'd probably think it was just great. I mean, Jo is like that ... I tend to hear "Joe" and imagine Joe, a guy, because I've seen that more often. But if the context indicates Jo, a gal, then it seems feminine. Same with many names ... they seem gendered according to the sex of the person bearing them, regardless of what the most common or expected gender is. Lynn, Kim, Sam ...
Jaye looks overdone to me, but it's alright if you really want to make the gender clear from the spelling. It's not half as bad as Faye imo.
I think her birth certificate said Jessie, but she went by Jay, at least as an adult, to everybody. Spelled Jay.
So I've always thought of it as unisex. I'm not sure whether I first heard the name for a guy, or the name of my relative. But Aunt Jay is the only female Jay I've ever encountered. I think that's why I prefer it on guys - I've learned to expect a guy, and so I figure others expect a guy. That makes it seem not feminine enough - when I'm thinking about it in the abstract, with no sexed person bearing it.
But if I met a female Jay I'd probably think it was just great. I mean, Jo is like that ... I tend to hear "Joe" and imagine Joe, a guy, because I've seen that more often. But if the context indicates Jo, a gal, then it seems feminine. Same with many names ... they seem gendered according to the sex of the person bearing them, regardless of what the most common or expected gender is. Lynn, Kim, Sam ...
Jaye looks overdone to me, but it's alright if you really want to make the gender clear from the spelling. It's not half as bad as Faye imo.
This message was edited 7/25/2023, 12:14 AM
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When I see Jay, I immediately think of the bird. And like Robin, Lark and Wren, I think Jay works very well as a unisex name. I can easily picture a man or a woman with this name.
However, I don’t like Jaye and Jae as alternate spellings; they look misspelled to me, just like Maye and Mae look like misspellings of May.
I think I prefer Jay as a nickname for longer names beginning with J.
However, I don’t like Jaye and Jae as alternate spellings; they look misspelled to me, just like Maye and Mae look like misspellings of May.
I think I prefer Jay as a nickname for longer names beginning with J.
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